Fear. There are very few words in the English language that behaviorally paralyze us, and many times, fill us with anxieties and apprehensions. Addicts and alcoholics don’t only have fears, they fear fear as well. Most of their fears are rooted in perceptions or misconceptions that, many times, stand in their way of getting help. That is why it is so important for significant others to understand the feelings and fears of their loved ones who are using drugs and alcohol. Through this renewed understanding, I am hopeful that sound dialogue and open communication will result in your loved one’s seeking help Remember, there is nothing shameful about having a drug and alcohol problem. There is if you don’t get help for it. There are many treatment and fellowship resources in your community. Please take advantage of them.
Areas To Consider Before Patient Enters Treatment:
- What is patient perspective of treatment in general or counselors, more specifically?
- Have they had any prior treatment experiences which may have left them with some negative
experiences?
- Be aware of the many fears they have, many of which they may not be specifically aware of:
A. Fear of dying with addiction
B. Fear of insanity
C. Fear of incarceration, hospitalization, or institutionalization
D. Fear of breaches in confidentiality; who may find out
E. Fear of loss of reputation, dignity, pride; they may be coming from families who have sent these messages throughout their life
F. Fear that accepting help is a sign of weakness
G. Fear they will be fired or their family will leave them because they appear weak
H. Fear of going through withdrawal and/or D.T.’s
I. Fear that heavy doses of medication, shock treatments, intensive psychiatry, etc. will be used in treatment
J. Fear they may know someone in waiting room or someone may see them coming for counseling
K. Fear of loss of respect by fellow employees and friends
L. Fear of not really knowing if they will get well; what if they fail, then what!
M. Fear they won’t be able to make all the necessary changes in their life which counselor may recommend
N. Fear that the costs of treatment will further burden the economic plight of the family
O. Fear of group process
P. Fear that they will have to stand up and acknowledge their addiction in fellowship meetings
Q. Fear that family has ulterior motives
R. Fear that life insurance, drivers license, etc. will be affected
S. Fears that they will have to tell counselor about their “skeletons in the closet” and they aren’t sure they want to do that
T. Fear of embarrassment - Have they received any ultimatums from family, employers, etc.?
- What kind of labeling do they already have; diagnosis, stigmas, etc.; they might be “living them” daily!
- You need to be aware of heightened state of paranoia, guarded behavior, fear of risk-taking, decided skepticism, and complete lack of trust.
